Apprentice 5 Episode 6: Hard Graft and Hard Luck

This was another buying/selling task with the added element of physical work. Most people in management positions don't encounter much hard graft so it was interesting to see how they would all cope. Jim and Tom played their role well as the Steptoe brothers with suspiciously clean overalls reminiscent of a politician visiting a building site. You could see the disgust of some as they pulled on togs they felt they would only ever have to wear ironically at an industrial rave. The task was to recycle rubbish. Not as easy as it looked, especially when a man who might as well have had a T-shirt saying "dodgy builder" made sure he put a year's fly tipping in the Team Logic van.

Team Venture was led by Zoe and Logic was led by Helen. Nothing interesting really to say about Logic except that it had Helen employed a high risk strategy and no impact Natasha was waffling about strategy again. The highlight was poor Tom's unalloyed relief at not losing and getting a treat. His analytical mind continues to impress. He had the cogs working comparing the relative price of scrap, and if Lord Sugar is after someone to re-invent the metal detector, Tom could be the winner.  Anyway, if you think of collecting rubbish as a value proposition, it seems to be a no brainer. Lift stuff, sell the lucrative scrap and dump the rest. Of course dumping has an opportunity cost (tipping fees, fuel etc) so offering to take away rubbish for free after a magpie eyed builder has extracted every sellable scrap really is a risk. So too is saying "I worked in construction so I know a bit about this". Chances are you don't, so keep your mouth shut Natasha. Mind you, the winning team Logic only won by 6 quid. Talk about a wafer thin margin! That said, with a profit margin of 65% it was one of the most profitable tasks ever on the apprentice. Expect to see a lot more scrap collecting vans in your area. Though that will quickly fall when they find their operating costs aren't being met. Factor in the fuel and the labour costs and it is a lot less lucrative.

Anyway, Zoe once again bullied Susan with her death ray glare and mono-drone voice which if she is acting is superb. She took on the role of PM again and once again I marveled at the gutlessness of the rest. After a clueless first day she went into emotional meltdown. The highlight for me was the way Susan and, yes Edna brought her back, re-energised the team and started to do some serious business.  Their reward - of course she brought them back into the boardroom though she could hardly have taken Glenn. Anyway Edna as well as never saying IDSFG, never say I have three degrees and never tell Lord Sugar you have an MBA. Unless that is its an experience assessed MBA from Hard Knocks University's course in "Just Bladdy Get On Wiv It and sell", Lord Sugar is not seduced by qualifications.  You also invite a rendition of 'stop in the name of love' and of course heap ridicule on the HR profession. Edna is a business psychologist which is not really an HR consultant is it? Anyway, the one who should have been fired with more velocity than a mars probe was Zoe. She got away with it. Favourite now is Glen, though Helen acquitted herself well. My own view is that she is yet to be tested. That said she is an executive assistant to a CEO and good EA's are in my view among the most resourceful of people.

Liked: Susan being proved right after passive aggressive buying of her strategy

Disturbing; Big Jim squaring up to Mr Dodgy the Builder.

Missing already: Edna and her wonderful NLP inspired Psych- ops which she failed to use in her defence.